Soft Space to Land

Children need a soft safe space to land. Especially these black teenagers and young adults. Kids in general think they know every damn thing and have all the answers when they haven’t experienced real-world grown folk hardships.

So, through their bright clear lenses their view of their self out in the world is that everything is a cake walk, and they’re going to do it better than you, mom and dad.

These little people can’t fathom the possibility of being vulnerable, not having the answers when faced with hard decisions, not knowing how to handle mistakes or picking up the pieces after things fall apart. It’s hardest on them when they’re trying to navigate life on their own for the first time, and not knowing how and if they’ll overcome. They haven’t really experienced shit. So, their frame of reference isn’t there. They think the loss they’ve suffered in a mistake, a letdown, a yet unfulfilled goal is the actual end of their world.

And then there’s social media to contend with!

Parents, we need to go easy on these babies. They are growing up in world of influencers. Everything can be had with ease and without struggle. Day in and day out they see the end result and not the hard work and sacrifice of the journey. Now they have time lapses too where things just come together so quickly and don’t understand why it’s taking so long to have what their little hearts’ desire. Why do they even need to plan when they can just go viral?

Blah Blah Blah

Keep talking to them, even when they don’t want to hear it. They’re listening and your words will come back (usually bring up feelings of regret and even guilt but that’s okay too) and maybe offer them guidance on how to deal with their situation. But if you’re able, don’t prolong their suffering. Don’t wait for the light to go out in their eyes to offer a safety net. I never understood that. There is honor in some sacrifices, but not in suffering needlessly.

Again, these kids need a soft space to land. The world is hard enough.